The Magic of Conscious Clutter Clearing
A while ago, an e-mail reached me from a very kind lady I've known for a couple of years. We've been on a number of courses and retreats together, have worked with each other several times, and even though we've never met outside these courses, I'd still call her a friend.
So, she sent me this e-mail. And it touched me so deeply, was so encouraging - showed me that indeed, what I offer can truly help people. Help them find courage and hope and even a purpose in life during their darkest times. I asked her permission to display her e-mail on my website - after removing certain personal details - and she agreed.
So here it is - a story about the magic of conscious clutter clearing:
Whilst I shared something briefly tonight that has been very profound and moving for me to witness, there wasn't the time and it perhaps wasn't fully appropriate time wise to say much. I wanted to share the story with the group, but I was very conscious that I had not sought your permission and I feel you have such a gentle humility in your soul, so I did not think it was my place to assume you would agree. I just wanted to make time now to validate the power of what has happened.
My friend had breast cancer 12 years ago, underwent a mastectomy and chemotherapy. The last three years she has been suffering with pain in her spine and ribs and has had blood tests, breast checks, all of which have come back negative. She believed she had Intercostal Neuralgia but found it difficult to get the doctors to listen to her. She finally had an MRI scan to look at her bones and I went with her last Thursday for the results, although she believed they would be fine.
The consultant gave her the news that there were metastasised cancers from the original tumour that were now on several areas of her spine, five ribs and sternum. He concluded after questioning that they still needed to check the organs, but all they can do is 'manage' her situation.
I brought her home here with me and her journey this week has been tumultuous as one might expect. We have very different views about death and the fear emanating from her has been tangible. She has had a burning desire to 'put her house in order' for when the inevitable happens and has been repeating these words several times a day, but has also voiced that she is not yet ready to 'die'.
I truly believe the power of the written and spoken word is immense and as each word was uttered I could feel her energy succumb to the mental / subconscious association of putting her house in order and dying.
I have been trying to feel her energy as a glass – is it full? Half full? Empty? How can I keep it topped up without overloading it? So quickly we can have a full glass and in one swallow (or word) it can empty, leaving us vulnerable and open to the myriad of thoughts that are all pervasive and all intrusive. This is no way to heal and one has to carefully measure whether it is the right time to top up the glass, or simply hold the space. Too much information about thought processes, beliefs, alternative options can be just as damaging if they are offered at the 'wrong' time for that person to receive them.
The words 'Conscious Clutter Clearing' came to me like a gentle rainfall in a desert and I did not need to think twice about whether I should share them. I suggested that she make a trade and use your words rather than use the habitual words that were clearly causing deep distress and after all, clearing out the clutter leaves so much space for wonderful new growth and new things to appear in our lives!
I overheard her speaking to a family member the following day and I think it was more poignant because she didn't realise I was there. She simply said, "I will definitely be doing some conscious clutter clearing with my house and with my thoughts."
I felt the energetic ripple of your beautifully named business spread through the ether into her heart and it touched mine too. It may well have spread to the family members heart too but regardless, that ripple will continue to spread. Yes it is still difficult for her. Yes she is experiencing 'highs' and 'lows', but I have seen something different in her eyes. I have seen a 'Joyful Spark' of hope and self belief. To see this in a very dear friend whom I love dearly is a gift indeed.
She has now enquired about the Gerson Therapy (An exact detoxifying programme that may rebuild the immune system and has many 'Gersonites' or survivors of very advanced illnesses and conditions, including cancer in the bone)
She actually said last night that she wants to prove mainstream medicine wrong and she believes she may have even finally found her purpose in life – to share with those suffering fear and doubt about their own diagnosis and tell them how she survived and not to give up just because mainstream medicine speaks a two syllable word that strikes fear into their heart and soul.
Thank you Heike, because your words have helped another soul more than you could ever know.